Freedom to Roam

I think we all, every last one of us, has a deep, underlying ,urge to explore. That urge to just wander about, without a care in the world, and be free. I personally, crave it. That beautiful feeling to go wherever, whenever, and however, you want, without the chains of responsibility, or doing the smart thing, holding you to any one place in particular. It’s a scary feeling when it happens though, isn’t it? Once you know you can go anywhere, and do anything, you suddenly want to find a place to settle down. A place to be, as a foundation to build your life on. Its incredibly frustrating. At this moment, i want to hop on the next bus out of town, and ride it till I find a nice looking town, and explore it for a couple weeks, then move on. Call it Gypsy blood, call it nomadic human nature, call it whatever you’d like. Actually, i think the latter is quite accurate, basic human nature, That’s how we, the humble Homo Sapien, evolved after all, correct? Since the moment we struggled from the primordial ooze, we’ve never stopped moving around. There is less and less of the world we haven’t, as a species, seen, conquered, and left. However, we still want more. We all want the feeling of being in a pristine, untainted, piece of nature, That absolute bliss of being completely alone, and without an obligation. I want that so badly. On the other hand, i’d thoroughly dislike it. I’d want something a little more stable, and  a little more permanent. I want a little cottage in the forest, one that no one, besides myself, and the woman i intend to spend the rest of my days with, even knows exists. I want it full of big, overstuffed, couches and arm chairs, One with a big spare room, every wall, covered in dark walnut bookshelves, and those shelves full of old, dusty books. I want that so much more than i want to travel. If i had to choose between the unexpectable, liberating, ability to travel the globe, and the dull, mundane, splendid, rigors of everyday life, I’d chose the latter every time. I’d choose to work a nine-to-five, struggling to make mortgage payments, and spending my evenings arguing with my partner, over being without a care in the world every single time. I think there’s something far more beautiful in that, than there is in having the freedom to roam. When you roam, your freedom comes from knowing that there’s no one that needs you. Knowing that you have no responsibility’s, other than those to yourself. Knowing that you can take care of yourself, and have no one to take care of. But those are exactly the things that i want. I want to feel needed. I want to know there is someone depending on me. I want to be taken care of when i’m sick, and I want to take care of my partner when they are sick. I want to be just as sure that i can take care of myself, as i am knowing I can take care of someone else. I want stability. I guess I’ll end this post as i always do. By saying, I don’t know. Because i really don’t. I am happily uncertain of anything in life. Certainty breeds only boredom, and expectations. Thank you for the read, and have yourselves a beautiful, stable, and perfect life, you exquisite, wonderful humans.